You know what happened. This wunderkind [she taps the braille tattoo on her leg] and this angel [she taps the tattoo on her right leg] were in a vulnerable position, maybe because I couldn't stay at home, without Ichiro in the picture. Both at once... I hadn't taught them well enough how to protect one another, I couldn't even protect one daughter! I couldn't be there for either one while she recovered from the pain of her sister's suffering. It lasted for nine days... God, that's almost less time than we've been here, you know? The real world is really different, there's more bureaucracy. It wasn't like I'd help anyone, I'd be letting people down. There was stuff to do first. Possessions. Food that would rot in the fridge. Rent, money matters. And of course I didn't know for sure, and if I were wrong that would be the absolute worst case scenario. But I thought about it a lot.
As you know, thanks to Seven, both of my sweethearts came back. And then obviously I had to not do it. Which was... not exactly effortless. I had to go straight from bumming around to momming them harder than ever. I couldn't go out to relax and leave my traumatized little girls alone, that's what got them into this mess in the first place. I had to be the adult and make them feel better. There was no adult to make me feel better. [With an idol's chipperness, brightening up and staying that way for the rest of the speech:] I'm my own adult~!
So instead, as soon as I could afford it, I invested in these babies. [She lifts up both the bangles, holds them together like handcuffs.] They don't just go with the belly dancing outfit, you know. Then whenever I was busy and wanted a break, I would look at my reflection in these instead. I invest in jewelry pretty much whenever I feel like complete shit, to remind myself that I am in fact beautiful and worth it. That's why I have so much. Because my strengths and weaknesses are pretty unevenly distributed.
no subject
[She fusses with her bracelets.]
You know what happened. This wunderkind [she taps the braille tattoo on her leg] and this angel [she taps the tattoo on her right leg] were in a vulnerable position, maybe because I couldn't stay at home, without Ichiro in the picture. Both at once... I hadn't taught them well enough how to protect one another, I couldn't even protect one daughter! I couldn't be there for either one while she recovered from the pain of her sister's suffering. It lasted for nine days... God, that's almost less time than we've been here, you know? The real world is really different, there's more bureaucracy. It wasn't like I'd help anyone, I'd be letting people down. There was stuff to do first. Possessions. Food that would rot in the fridge. Rent, money matters. And of course I didn't know for sure, and if I were wrong that would be the absolute worst case scenario. But I thought about it a lot.
As you know, thanks to Seven, both of my sweethearts came back. And then obviously I had to not do it. Which was... not exactly effortless. I had to go straight from bumming around to momming them harder than ever. I couldn't go out to relax and leave my traumatized little girls alone, that's what got them into this mess in the first place. I had to be the adult and make them feel better. There was no adult to make me feel better. [With an idol's chipperness, brightening up and staying that way for the rest of the speech:] I'm my own adult~!
So instead, as soon as I could afford it, I invested in these babies. [She lifts up both the bangles, holds them together like handcuffs.] They don't just go with the belly dancing outfit, you know. Then whenever I was busy and wanted a break, I would look at my reflection in these instead. I invest in jewelry pretty much whenever I feel like complete shit, to remind myself that I am in fact beautiful and worth it. That's why I have so much. Because my strengths and weaknesses are pretty unevenly distributed.